A lot has happened since my last 'dog blog'... And I've added another stamp to my passport! Even though the journey from Gouves in Crete to Worthing, Sussex was not without its spooky and frightening bits - what with van, ferry, aeroplane (AEROPLANE!!??) ferry again and van stints to get here. But, having settled in for just two weeks in the UK, I was whisked away and crossed over water again. My uprights said it was the 2nd worst channel crossing they have ever had. I can't believe that anyone can have had 200 crossings without being on wages on board the ship... but then, I'm just a dog. In my box in the van (I love my box - I call it home) I was low down in the ship - but it was much worse than the Mediterranean and I was a bit sick... but the humans said they thought we were all going to die. So...we've been to France and I liked it! They've got what they call their 'renovation project' over there... I didn't have to get involved in that. Best thing for me was the garden - behind the barns is the 'playground'... well that's what it looked like to me - a huge piece of grass like a football pitch with a few trees...where I could run and jump and go a bit mad. And then, sitting in front of a huge log fire in the evening... lovely!
It was here that I first picked up on the possibility that I might be royalty (I know... I may have to check out my family tree). One of them said "have you seen the 'king dog and the way he performs in the garden after he's been fed?"... and again, the next day, when I was caught short in the lounge and the door to the garden was shut... "this 'king dog has done a poo in the lounge!... It's your turn to clean up after him!" Now that's what I call royal treatment!
Apparently when I am fully developed I will have a vocabulary of about 200 words... they use the term 'commands'... cheeky buggers! Little do they know... since my native language is Greek I've already used up a few of that 200 and now they are giving me the old "sit, stay, do a wee, do a poo, down, good boy, roll over, in your bed... and other stuff in English. So I'm reckoning it might just be a 100... who knows? I can see it's going to be a long haul for me to put them fully in the picture.
Anyway... I'm Greek and royalty too... You know what...I could be related to Prince Philip!!
And wow, it was quiet in France...Not a bit like Gouves OR Worthing. Two or three tractors a day went past in a day and that was it...So quiet at night I had to keep pinching myself to see if I was still alive. There were a couple of other dogs at the farm down the road and we met up... amongst talking uprights... Had a nose to nose - the other local dogs are OK. But I had a very close shave with a giant... The uprights said it was a Newfoundland (I thought that was a remote province of Canada) but, we were having a nice walk by the canal and Voom there he was on top of me. I thought I was a gonner. One of my uprights threw themselves in between me and the giant and the other one lifted me off the ground on the lead! I'm hoping he learns that's not probably the best way to get out of these situations... like hanging me just because I'M being attacked!
Anyway... since we've been back in the UK., they've put me through a few embarrassing things - And I've done my first proper photo shoot, which they found most amusing. I think they must have been drinking. ... I'm working out how I can get my own back. There's something big coming up and it involves a celebration for all of them... involving presents, drinking stuff I wouldn't give to one of my courtiers! And also singing and dancing, watching TV and playing games and, apparently, wearing reindeer antlers... are you with me on this? They think it's hilarious!
But the good news is... and I have been a bit worried about this every time I meet new uprights... I feel I might be handed over again! But I haven't been given away to anyone else so far - These two are OK...Maybe a bit slow on the uptake about all my particular needs... Especially now that I know I have royal blood in my veins!
I've been told to sign off by saying... Have a Great Christmas and a Happy New Year whatever that is! So...Over and Out! Cheers All - Rudy - Hey that's a bit like Rudolph and he had antlers! Wow!
